A friend of mine has asked me to proofread part of his statement of purpose for the Japanese college he wants to get into. He needs to make a short speech in English at the inteview. Are there any grammatical mistakes below?

My goal is to be a high school teacher. When I was in the third-year of junior high, I was impressed by my homeroom teacher very much. He devoted himself to understanding each of the students in his class. He was friendly and gave full support to develop their potential. I would like to be a teacher like him. To realize my dream, I've been doing my best. For example, in junior and senior high schools, I was captain (chief) of the track and field club,and tried bringing unity by communicating with each member thoroughly and giving them suitable advice for improvement.
Teaching is a very attractive profession . Teachers help students be independent mentally, and also enjoy their growth. I'd like to study at the Education Faculty of your college, which provides unique facilities and programs like "a mock calssroom for teaching practice" and "teaching internship." I'd like to acquire every knowledge required to be a good teacher like my junior high teacher here.